It's not a problem... it's a project begging to be discovered!

I recently fell in love with a new blog called Remodelaholic.



I'm pretty sure that is what I am as well :)

I have also found a lot of inspiration at my good friend PJ's blog. She's kinda amazing. Totally.

Anywho, at Remodelaholics, one of their recent posts was an effort to come up with a better way to organize little girl hair clippies and jewelry without having to be crammed into some ugly plastic bins. You can make it a part of you decor as well as functional. I made me think of the bathroom hair organizer I concocted when we moved.

The best and worst thing about the house in Great Lakes was all the storage. When we first moved in, we did not have nearly enough stuff to fill it all up. We rapidly began filling it. The down side to that... moving to a place with not as much storage! Over all we have great storage here in the new house... but our master bathroom is easily half the size with next to no storage.

Boats and I can be vain at times (lol) so we have a lot of stuff that is kept in the bathroom. This posed the first dilemma... making space with no space to make it in.

The next issue I had is naked wall space. Nothing drives me crazy like naked walls. Seriously. Breakup the space people!! There is no reason you can't hang a picture. SOMETHING! (rant over) And there was this random, naked spot over the toilet in the master bath. They could have given us a bigger mirror... but that's neither here nor there. I needed to find a practical way to fill up that space.

The other down side to moving. Things get broken. I had quite a few beautiful wall candle holders that had glass votive holders that a few glass pieces got broken. With out all the glass, it looks silly to hang them on the wall and you can't buy just the replacement glass (unless it is something like Party Lite, which this was not).

So what to do? Throw it out?

Psssssht. Nope. The more I looked at it, the more I was determined to find a use for it. Four out of the 8 glass containers were in tact.

Looking at one of the openings, I realized it was just big enough for me to put my blow dryer in. Then the rest of it fell into place!

Just in case you have the same issues (or just want to make something awesome for your bathroom) here is a little step by step:

First I had spray painted it an antique white and then secured it to the wall.



Since I knew that I was going to have some odd shaped items on it and unevenly distributed weight, I knew I needed to secure it in the bottom as well on both sides to that it would not tip when I put something in or took anything out. I simply put two nails in on either side at the bottom.



Now that it is secured to the wall, you can add the glass jars with your small items. I chose to put mine on the top so that my bigger items would have room on the bottom.



Then you can add everything else. My flat iron is very narrow, but it stays in place when I wrap the cord around the bottom. (Make sure your iron is cool before wrapping it up and storing it.)





On one of the extra open loops, I clip on some of the cute hair flowers. It makes it so they don't get squished and displays them nicely. You could hang necklaces as well if it was high enough.



And with everything all together, it is complete!



There was still a lot of space above the piece, and no where to hang my decorative 'not for use' towels, lol. We have two towel hangers on the opposite walls, but they are so close to the shower, I know they would end up getting used. Don't ask me why I hang towels I don't allow anyone to use... I get that from my mom! So what I did was I took an extra curtain rod and mounted it and hung the towels above the piece. I also hung one of my costume jewelry pieces from it. (I cannot wear jewelry. At least not for very long or I break out in a rash so I don't buy much of it.)



So there you have it... three problems that came together and triumphed into a beautiful and functional piece!

Boom goes the dynamite.

Worst. Idea. Ever.

I am still telling myself that I should not be posting this. Yet that voice in the back of my head is telling me if I don't, then I will do my usual and not follow through with what I say I am going to do.

Here is the deal. I by no means think that I am 'fat'. I know that I have my own insecurities, as we all do. The things that bother me about myself might not be something that would bother someone else. But I'm not someone else. I am me, and often times, I am not comfortable in my own skin.

The real question is... even if I achieve my goals... will I be happy there? When I first started on my weight loss journey almost 18 months ago (wow!) I had only wanted to reach 150.

I hit that, and wanted to go for more. I wanted to reach 140.

I hit that too. I didn't really set another goal after 140, but for the last 6 months or so I have been tettering around the 130-135 range.

Ever since we moved, I have lost my routine. I feel the winter fluff, and it's making. me. crazy.

So it's 'only a few pounds'. But that is where it starts people!! I weighed in this morning at... oh lordy... (138). Yes, I made it small for a reason, lol. That is a painful number for me after how hard I worked and knowing I have recently been down to as low as 130.

Fact is, I have gotten lazy. I have been stressed out. I have been eating things I know I shouldn't, and more than I need. I am hoping that by posting all of this for the world to see, two things will be accomplished.

1. It will keep me motivated to be able to actually show/see progress as I get back to my routine.

2. It will help anyone else who feels as though they have been slipping up to get back on track.

Staying with a diet is impossible for me. I need to eat what I want. If I don't, I will binge eat. That said, I was using simple portion control. Allowing myself a moderate amount of the things I crave to curb the craving and eliminating the chance of binge eating. So with the portion control, comes a serious workout routine. I have not tried P90X, but maybe I should :) I personally like GOING to a gym. I see people there with better bodies than me, and it pushes me harder. I know for some people, its the opposite.

So... after this, there will be no more chance of humility. It will all be out there, and all I can do is work my ass off to be able to post some awesome after pictures.

Here goes nothin...

My biggest problem area... thighs! I really feel like they have a mind of their own. They dont seem to fit with the rest of my body :/

Sorry the text came out so small in some. Well... not really, lol. So there they are! Just for reference... the next picture is what I would die for!!

OMG!! Carrie Underwoods legs are UH-mazing! Seriously. I was drooling last night watching Idol. Her legs are phenomenal, and I would love to be able to achieve that kind of change! I'm not holding my breath though ;)

Are you planning a full body overhaul for Summer?

Missing person.

Where has she gone?

You know... that girl that used to be confident, fearless, and sassy. I have had one hell of a time trying to track her down these days. Every once in a while she will emerge. But her stay is always short and seems to end with a major crash and burn leaving her more damaged than before.

I know what did it. Its nothing that can be taken back either, just worked through.

She takes the most innocent comments to heart, and they almost always crush her like a metric ton. Sadness riddles her face and heart, but the really sad part is that she is not the only victim. When she suffers, so do her kids. But you know what helps her snap out of her fog?

Her kids.

When you see her, you will never know about the continuous battle being waged inside her chest. You will never see the countless insecurities, because even when she reveals them to select people, they just tell her she is being ridiculous and that she should not feel that way. They don't realize, that doesn't help. It's not that she is always asking for help... but just an ear. She knows there is no magic word or pill or anything that can take it all away. Except one.

So she waits. And prays. Repeat.

Her awakening is coming. But for now, she is just missing. Her body will go through the motions, but there is hardly anything left inside. How do you live with a person like that? God only knows.

So don't patronize her. Don't tell her that some day it will all be fine. Don't tell her to stop thinking about the few pounds she wants to loose. Focusing on ANYthing is good for her when she feels like she retains nothing she reads, hears or sees anymore. Don't tell her it could be worse. For her, it can't.

Everything feels like a personal attack or rejection. Everything. Take a minute to think about how that would feel. Even perfect strangers have a sickening amount of power over her. Their words can rip through her and cause even more doubt in herself even when that is not their intention.

You have no idea the amounts of hell she has had to endure. Maybe yours has been pretty bad too, or worse even. But do not try to compare. It will not help either of you.

Don't think that by telling her how awful your life has been, that it will make her feel better. It wont. It just creates additional hurt for you. She doesn't like seeing her friends in pain either.

The battles continue. The insecurities deepen. Pain intensifies. Wounds fester under the bandages. Faking it is the easy part. Living with it everyday feels impossible.

So she will smile. Do the things she is supposed to in order to keep people from asking questions. She's not the type to dump all her troubles on anyone else, so she won't talk about it with you. Or anyone. It's just a waiting game. I can't say what it is she needs anymore. It might be nothing. It might be everything. When your world gets repeatedly flipped upside down and violently shaken to pieces, you tend to get a little disoriented.

There is a happy side to this. She isn't totally alone. God is in her heart, and He knows it all, sees it all, and feels it all, just as she does. Her husband and her children may be oblivious aside from the mood swings, but they are there too. If it was not for them... lets just not go there. But her children should not be what is holding her together. It is not their job to wipe away the tears when it all overwhelms her.

But they do. And it breaks her heart even more.

So don't be fooled. You might think you have someone all figured out. You might think that you know all the pieces, but I assure you... you don't. A lot gets said, but even more is left unsaid. On her search for validation, she will complain about things that are just the tip of the ice berg. Her weight. Her chore list. Her studies. But each complaint has much deeper roots. It is not up to you to get to the bottom of it.

Just know that it's only the surface.

She has moments of great happiness. Everyday in fact. It's just that the happiness does not usually outweigh the worry. Not every day anyway. So until her awakening comes, wait it out. Don't retreat and leave her truly alone... because she will be back.

She has to be.

Quickie pictures :))

I know I have been slacking in the photo department, so here are a few of my more recent faves. I am hoping to be updating my navigation tabs soon with fresh photos!

Malaya, Grace and Lauren: Marching in heels. Startin' em young.

Who's momma's good boy??

What? He likes to kiss me and he was enjoying the bath!

My amazingly beautiful family. We are far from perfect, but we are a perfect match.

Been to hell and back and we are still smilin'!

How long can I put off my paper...

Here I am... putting off my papers once again! :) I work better under pressure, lol.

So with the exception of the boys' room, the house is basically done! For the most part, anyway. I say that because now I am embarking on the remodeling journey. Not like a remodel of the house, more like an overhaul of some stuff. Don't worry, it will all become clear as my next few posts come along with the progress of transforming some of my old things into brand new things. I have tons of projects planned, so it is just a matter of staying on track with one project at a time! I am suuuuuper excited for some of them, including the make over of my coffee table, a microwave cabinet, corner hutch, outdoor furniture and more. I am hoping to redo these on a low budget as well, so I will be sure to keep track of what I spend along with each overhaul.

So much has been going on around here, I have been having a hard time slowing down to enjoy the beautiful weather and time with my kiddos. I have managed to restart my running and Harley has been loving that! I take him with me, and I always smile when he see the constant whiplash turn arounds from people seeing how big he is. He isnt even 9 months old yet, and I'm willing to bet he is over 120 at this point. I have finally gotten to a point of trusting him enough to sleep in the bedroom with us. He slept in a kennel until he own grew it, and then in a corral to keep him confined to one area while I could not have eyes on him, such as sleeping time. But the last few nights I have allowed him and Kadence to sleep in the room with us. They have both done so well! I didn't worry about Kadence... but Harley is still a baby. Other than sitting on my side of the bed with his head over my neck until I pretend like I am asleep before he will go settle at the foot of the bed on the floor, he does great! I feel much better being able to allow him to roam.

I got an email about him this morning actually. The breeder I got him from has another litter and one of the prospective new families wanted to ask the owners of the previous litter about our experience with the pups. Of course I wrote a novel... how could I not? Harley has been one of the best things to happen to our family in a long time! Many times I have cried into those floppy ears of his and he just let me hold his great big head in my chest. I talk to him all the time when I am lacking adult conversation. I could literally fall backwards and he would catch me... he is always there. The one constant in my life. It is weird to think about a dog having that role in a persons life, but anyone who actually knows us knows that I am not making it up! He has just been this amazing light for me.

Everyday gets better. Boats and I have been making a conscious effort to remind each other everyday how much we appreciate what we do for each other. Does that mean we never have a dispute? Uh... no. He still ticks me off and I still nag him for it, but we deal with it differently now. The rough roads, the painful words, the seemingly impossible situations have all lead us here. To this place of truly unconditional love. Many people say that they love their spouse unconditionally, but that's just not true. There are usually conditions. All I know is that this works for us. It wouldn't work for most people, but most people are as awesome as we are, LOL :)) No, but really... things are getting better and better and everyday I regain a little more confidence in myself and my abilities to be the kind of wife God wants me to be. Although I would not want to relive most of what we have been through, I wouldn't change anything either.

This also brings me to another change in our house. It has become clear to me that our kids have a hard time listening to us. We say something, and a lot of times they just straight up ignore us. This has lead us to resort to yelling.

A lot.

Too much.

No more.

Clearly the yelling is doing nothing anyway. Do they hear us, yes. Do they listen, no.

Sometimes there is a need to yell... like in an urget situation or if we are in another room and just need their attention. But once we have their attention, the volume needs to be taken down. I had yelled at Bubba the other day because once again he was refusing to eat lunch. After I was done, Bug looked at me and said 'Im good, Mommy?I got no screams because I ate my lunch and I'm good. But not him. Him got screams because he's bad.' Yea... they have a name for it. Awesome.

So thanks to my beautiful little eye opener, Screams will be making an exit. Boats and I discussed it the other night so that if we see the other reaching that point, we can have a signal to defuse the situation. Our kids are smart, and they deserve better. They have lifted me up from my lowest points, they very least I can do is not crush their little spirits by screaming at them over something as ridiculous as spilling water or not eating every last bite of a meal. Is it worth the possibility of ruining my relationship with them? Hell no.

With that, I'm off to workout, then wash my car and return my gray dog back to his white form, lol. Then after lunch its time to get cracking on one of my papers due on Friday :) Perhaps I'll get around to posting more pictures soon!

Me

It's out to get me,

I would love to catch a break in this house right about now. I'm not talking about chores or house work or anything... I'm talking about the house itself! The night we moved we discovered that the fridge was broken. Lovely. Luckily maintenance considers that an emergency and sent someone out. After initially telling me it was all my fault, the tech took the motor back to the shop and returned with a huge apology and a brand new fridge. Does it stop there? Oh no... Im just getting warmed up.

The spiders are ridiculous. Not just huge, but by the plenty! All the black widows and brown recluses' you could want. I even had one spring out from under the folded pillow cases on my night stand. We sprayed for them after we bought some stuff that came highly recommended. Wouldn't ya know, it didn't work. Just light night, a quarter size brown recluse charged me as I folded laundry on the floor. My trusty flip flop took care of that funny business.

There are vents in each bathroom, as in most bathrooms anymore. The difference with ours is that when you turn it on, it sounds like you just started up a '67 Nova in the bathroom. If that were actually the case, I might not complain. So if I am in the downstairs bathroom, and the kids are in the living room, I cannot hear a DARN thing. Then when Boats has his man time in the bathroom, the vent has to run forever and you have to jack up the volume on the TV to hear over it!

On the same note, the air conditioner is crazy loud too. At our old house, you could hear the unit kick on and the air blowing out a bit, but nothing disruptive. The unit is so loud, I actually do everything I can to avoid turning it on at all! At least it cools the house down fast and I can shut it off.

Then there is the hall closet door. It is a bi-fold door, and a few days after moving in Bug opened it to get her shoes out. The whole dang thing fell OFF the hinges and on top of HER!! That call to maintenance was not so nice, but at least the girl on the other end was very understanding as to why I was so ticked. The guy came out and fixed it and said he was going to order a new door because our was busted (duh) but we never heard anything else about it. Today it fell off again. Luckily I was the one opening it and I caught it before it actually fell. But really??!? Come on! Give a girl a break. I don't want to call and give them this crazy long list, but lets be real here... they are getting a crap ton of money in rent, the least they can do is a few upgrades and make sure there are not life threatening bugs in the house!!

So while I am loving getting my Cali color back in the 80+ degree weather, I would also enjoy having a house that will not make me go gray before I turn 26 next month! Once I get a little more time, Ill put up some photos of the house :) Even if it hates me, I still made it all purdy on the inside.

Mrs. J.